Remember, remember/the 5th of November

Ok, so a new post. a post with more than one sentence and no "images."

I have to admit, I'm happy Obama won. actually, I'm happy it's all over now, I've been following this election over a year and have been fairly tired of it since the primaries's were over and we were left with the classic choices of ....*insert obnoxious/inappropriate south park quote here* (I didn't have the guts to type it but if you know what I mean you know it's true).

I'm happy Obama won because it proves me wrong. I was fairly certain there would be a bradly effect or that America was not "ready" for a black president but I have been proven wrong and that makes me really happy.

And change is nice, I think in six months we'll be less enthusiastic about it but everyone was tired of Bush so it's fairly wonderful to have something new.

Personally Obama lets me down big time as a democrat. All I could hope from him was an end to the war and while he does want to get out of Iraq he wants to go into Iran and Afganistan which to me isn't a change at all. Most of his other opinions I consider "non-issues" as in...why are we talking about healthcare? that is NOT the government's job! so I'm bound to disagree period (though I disagreed with McCain for many of his non-issue-issues too so what difference does it make?).

in conclusion? Yay change in person! Not so yay the lack of actual change and change for the sake of change (lots of people who voted for the bailout said "well, I don't think this is the right thing to do but gosh darn it...we've gotta do SOMTHING!" that's change for the sake of change and I just don't dig it).

What was this blog post even about? It doesn't matter, it's not likely to be read.

Eternal Life, War & Vines

I made the top one today and the other two yesterday. I've started using photobucket to upload because blogger is giving me errors. I'm not sure how much I like the last two, the top one I think came out nicely.

different

accidental art

I really should stop making these at 1 & 2am...and why is my black so washed out? what's the point of these overly-high-contrast images is they're not even high contrast. silly internet, washed out images are for calm people!

Laughter

Passion For (or "What's you're passon for" ... I'm not sure yet)

I mentioned at some point I had a new idea for this blog. This is it.

For many years whenever I saw a gestural or "abstract" (using quotes because I'm using it improperly but most people don't know how to use it properly) drawing I assumed that each mark was deliberate, thought out, just like a slow detailed representational drawing.

For many years I was also under the impression that music and musicians are spontaneous workers. A light bulb flips on and bam! a full song is formed and soon to be recorded perfectly with all elements from the bass line and vocals to the guitar distortion and hand clapping noise in the background.

Over the summer I found out that one of those ideas was very wrong and came to the conclusion that both are likely misconceptions. The gestural work I mistook for abstraction was actually quite spontaneous, often times taking courage and experience to get right. The music on the other hand likely comes in pieces, slowly again with lots of work and experience.

I was thinking about these two concepts again today. I wonder what else I've mixed up.

This isn't the new idea for the blog. That may or may not come whenever I have time (I love hoe decisive I am!)

Yay! I'm going to acl! wow. that's a lame post. I need to finish packing.

I have a new idea for where I want this blog to go but I won't share/start it until I have more time.

much love,

-Hannah

I want to dance. I was having a dance party in my car while driving home but alas, it was a bit unsatisfying considering I was by myself. It's always better to sing that way though, you can passionately belt out a chorus without the fear of any sort of embarrassment totally indulging in American idol fantasies! lol.

yeah, lets dance.

I love talking to people I know well. Tim and Jennifer came over before work just now and I hounded them for at least twenty minutes. It's just so nice to talk and discuss and be excited about existence. I think it's spawned from being at school so much and not seeing anyone regularly.

my mulberry tree is dying and there's no place for me in the backyard anymore.

But a cool wind has blown in and I feel alive again. Not to say I wasn't alive before but something about the world changes with the constant swirling rustle of tree branches and your hair getting swooped up the minute you step outside.

I realized why I don't post much any more. I tell all my interesting facts of the day to Allen and therefore have no need to repeat myself on here. Yay Allen!

I was awake for 19 hours yesterday. That was probably a dangerous drive home even though I had coffee I was still thinking I might fall asleep. Luckily I was following Allen so he would have seen me dangerously swerve off the road if I did fall asleep (would have been better if I could have just DRIVEN WITH HIM!) (car situations were frustrating yesterday because we met after school at the palladium for the European Film Fest and then had to go to Colleens and there was no convenient place to leave one car where we could go back and pick it up later, arg).

The European film fest (of which I only got to see ONE film :( was great!

-Hannah

I wish I could deal with how crappy I feel without the urge to write a freakin rant about it. why does everything have to be so public?

I wish people would stop telling me I'm fat. I know I'm fat! Lemme and my fat alone! gosh.

I really like the song "counting Blue Cars" by Dishwalla. Mostly because of the chorus.

And ask many questions
Like children often do
We said,
Tell me all your thoughts on God
'Cause I would really like to meet her.
And ask her why we're who we are.
Tell me all your thoughts on God,
Cause I am on my way to see her.
So tell me am I very far -
Am I very far now?

God being a "Her" just makes me happy (personally I don't think God is a Him or a Her, He's God! but it gives the song an interesting aspect). The beginning "ask many questions/as children often do" makes the song highly nostalgic and can be taken as advice or a happy memory. But the question itself "Tell me all your thoughts on God" is not a child-like question, another interesting aspect mixing adult questions with childlike nostalgia plus there is a religious aspect without being overly religious. The verses kind of suck, they're not bad as far as words but musically uninteresting, delivered very slow and taking one or two lines to complete a thought (letting breaks fall every two or three words and then having to stuff longer thoughts/phrases into a very short amount of time making parts indistinguishable).

I still like the song though.

I love Texas weather.

clouds

My class is getting a little easier. I really like the prof, he's really funny! Waking up is getting easier too. I'm starting to really really enjoy the sunrise. And the clouds. I never actually see the sun on my drive but the clouds are amazing, pink, gold, grey and white all together with a blue backing; constantly amazing me. A couple days ago I was late and said a little prayer for help--I was thinking of getting there on time, God was thinking of something else though--I went around a curve and was face to face with a whole sky of beautiful pink clouds! *sigh*

One other thing I love about waking up and driving early is the street lights. I get to watch them turn off while I drive! it's so cool! like a little surprise whenever one flips off. They seem to go in a random order as some turn off while others stay on.

I have been making a point to wake up and get going without the aid of caffeine for the last week and a half but I finally made some coffee this morning. The last thing (I can think of right now) that I love about waking up so super early is those first two sips of coffee and the euphoric effect as the fog leaves your mind and your eyes feel like they can see. (yay drugs!). I think if I use coffee all the time this effect might wear off so I probably shouldn't over do it.

I'm not looking forward to driving in the rain tomorrow so hopefully it will rain tonight and I will be free sailing in the morning. whatever happens: keep an eye on those clouds! they're sure to be ominously beautiful.

I heard Jesus is Just Alright by the Doobie Brothers on the radio the this morning. It reminded me of an episode of Geeks and Freaks where the freaks have a party and this one guy starts playing it on the piano. It also got me thinking about religious references in songs. Most great songs have a religious reference of some sort, Paul Simon for example mentions something religious in almost every song but not as blatant as saying "Jesus is just alright with me."

I got into this whole idea of why certain songs pertaining the term "Jesus" get on popular radio while others are only on Christian radio. Why do some songs become contemporary while other are restricted. The Musician's other music is part of it, the Doobie Brothers of course have many other contemporary hits that were on popular radio before Jesus Is Just Alright. It also may be the connotation in the song. The title states that Jesus is just alright, it's not a praise and worship song, simply "I've got no beef with this big guy, he's cool with me" rather than "whoa! Hallelujah! he's amazing" (which reminds me of another religious reference in a song..."Hallelujah I Love Her So").

what about Musicians who are only known for their song that relates to Jesus. What if God Was One of Us is kind of one of those. I'd never heard of Joan Osborne before that song or since (maybe that's just because I don't watch anything in the media where I would have heard something else about her). Some people were also outraged by that song (One line of the Chorus goes "Just a slob like one of us" and many people were appaled that she would compare God's glorious creation as a SLOB *OH MY!*).

Anyway, I had to leave the computer for a long time to help my nephew make lunch so I kind of lost my train of thought on this whole thing. I think the general point was that it is interesting how some songs that specifically focus on religion get air play on popular radio while others are ignored. One other note is that when artists who were strictly Christian branch out to music that are just general love songs (Monk and Nagel come to mind as does Ginny Owens and Jill Philips) why arn't they considered for airplay on popular stations.


...The band Creed comes to mind on that subject, they've switch back and forth between the "Christian" and "Rock" grenres every time they break up or the lead singer gets saved again.

Do you know of any other songs that have blatent religous referances and are/were played on popular radio? Can you name some Christian artists who write music that has a "secular" subject matter in addition to their normal Christian music.

I realized today that with blogspot I don't feel quite comfortable enough to post just a random phrase. I used to use xanga to record memories in a way only I would remember when I looked back at them later. I think those one or two line posts are the reason it was always so hard when I was forced to shut down a blog. To have a huge log of all your memories, everything you felt was important to write down spanning back for a couple years and to have to delete it...strangely painful. is that pathetic?

I wanted to post something about clouds and silver linings but then I thought "no, I'm not on xanga anymore, I can't put up a one line post about clouds and silver linings, that would just be silly."

This has me thinking about all my memories I remember making specific blogs about. Making Peanut Brittle for SHC with the grandmothers who were going to sell it to support the school. I had never made peanut brittle before and the chemical reaction when you put the baking powder into the mix and then have to stir like crazy. I remember feeling the steam from the stove drying out my face and my arm aching from stirring for what seemed like forever.

Other posts I vividly remember have to do with death. After Aunt Alice passed away and Mrs. Donoho. My post about aunt Alice was a memory of the night she fell the broke her hip. Thinking back that was probably one of the scariest moments of my life, sitting and trying to comfort a fallen old woman waiting for an ambulance and knowing there's nothing in the world I can do. I'm doing a photo montage for a girl who was named after someone named Alice, I bet her Alice was as nice as mine (but mine made better pound cake hands down).

I remember posts about purple feet and mulberry trees. posts when I had gone crazy and was putting myself back together. posts about sitting under a tiny tree in our front yard watching cars.

but really all I wanted to say is that I had a beautiful drive home and clouds are wonderful. (not to mention they have silver linings).

thoughts on drinking

I'm still kind of confused about all the blogspot settings but I suppose I will get there.

I went to a party last night (it's only going to be "last night" for ten more minutes so I better write quickly) and I came up once again with my aversion to alcohol. The party was at a particular friends house where drinking is just a regular thing. I realized once again that I have no desire to get drunk or drink excessively. I think this is really strange, probably because there have been serious low points in my life where I really did want to get drunk. Maybe the aversion is because my mom has constantly told me that I WILL become an alcoholic if I drink, ever, at all. I think more likely it's the fact that I've researched such a wide variety of drugs and I know that alcohol is a poison (literally). Plus it tastes awful! I complained about the taste to my siblings one day last week and they quickly recommended four or five drinks I should try.

I consumed three/four daiquiris at the party and one "Dirty Turtle" (an invented drink that tastes too much like alcohol for me to like) which I think Becky may have given me in a moment of forgetfulness about my age. I watered it down with Sprite every few sips and waited for the ice to melt until it was drinkable.

I think, for me, the "good" parts of drinking don't out weigh the taste. drinking is so self destructive and represents (to me anyway) being so unhappy with myself or my situation that I need to use alcohol to cope with other issues. Maybe I read too much about addiction in middle school?

This is just something that's been on my mind lately. I don't condone excessive alcohol use but I respect everyone's right to do whatever they want as long as they don't harm other individuals so feel free to keep on drinking. I also know that drinking can be used as a relaxing agent in non-destructive environments. personally I'm more fun when I'm high on Dr. Pepper than I imagine I would be drunk.

hello world!

ok, so I'm going to start actually using this. I had forgotten it was even here actually and tried to make a new account with the same name. I was totally freaked out when somebody (me) had already taken HarmonyMelodyPress.

I was trying to blog on xanga, a blog site that I have used for about four years (it has been going downhill for the last couple months) when I logged in and was immediately sent to a "take this survey so we can make money off of you page" disgusted I decided to take the blogspot plunge. I'm hoping to find it a lot nicer here.

that's all for now. I have to actually work before I go to school this morning or else I will be one step further into the poor college student personality I already portray.